EVERYONE DESERVES A PLACE TO DEVELOP AND CULTIVATE THE RELATIONSHIP THEY WANT WITH PEOPLE OF LIKE MINDS
If anyone is happy with online dating and/or matchmaking and any other means of dating, please continue, Finally Luv is NOT for you. However, if what you are doing is NOT yielding results; and you are frustrated and discouraged, then Finally Luv is for you. Here you will Meet Real People, Face to Face, Up Close and Personal at our weekly scheduled events.
Providing a fun and engaging meeting place for the diverse singles communities in Southern California
- ♡ Fairness, Forgiving, Friendship, Flourishing
- ♡ Inspire, Integrity, Intuition, Inner Peace
- ♡ Noble, Nurturing
- ♡ Accepting, Accountability, Attentiveness
- ♡ Laugh, Letting Go, Lovable
- ♡ Loyalty
- ♡ Youthful at Heart
- ♡ Love
- ♡ Unity, Uncompromising, Unconditional
- ♡ Values, Victorious, Vulnerability, Vows
Welcome to our new website!
We’re looking forward to sharing with you our services, activities and events, which brings new possibilities. We hope that you not only explore the site, but that you interact with us in person. Please contact us to learn more!More info
Take a look and join us!
We’re excited to have you join us and can’t wait to get started with all the events and activities we have planned. We have over 100+ events planned to welcome you to Finally Luv with information, travel, fun and food!More info
Meeting at Group Social Events!
Meet a community of singles at our group social events. Our events are designed to make it easy to meet someone. No pressure and no games. Only a fun way to create new connections, make new friends and become part of a fun singles community.More info
THE PROBLEM WITH ONLINE DATING
First, it is opposite of face to face interaction. Second, it does not help heal the emotional pains of some online daters.
Online dating is a category-base, rather than an interaction-based process.
Category-based process, uses some concepts to predict both possibilities of acceptance and rejection by the others. It is an artificial type because both rejection and acceptence by the daters are not about rejection and acceptence of real persons, but of the imagined or preceived attributes of their categories.
People never falling in love with categories, ( even Eharmony use of personality traits as the basis of matching does not respresent real human experience and characteristics ). Because only real interpersonal process can create the feelings of love. Love is created and maintained by the process of meaniful communication, ( including validating accurate perceptions and invalidating inaccurate preceptions of interpersonal reality ).
Additionally, love is highly individualistically based. One loves another person because the Mr Right or Ms Right is unique individual in one's eye.
Why Online Dating Is A Poor Way To Find Love
THE BASIC INGREDIENTS FOR LOVE
Creating and maintaining love involves validating communications between the partners on a variety of issues, including understanding and concern for the partner's personal and emotional needs, developing companionship, physical attractiveness, cultivating and nurturing physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual well beings, respecting, supporting, forgiving, accepting, and encouraging, expressions of appreciation and affection; sexual pleasure and fidelity, commitment, shared activities, as well as the absence of controlling, defensiveness, contempt, stonewalling, and blaming, among other factors.
To accomplish the above task, the partners need to engage in the meaningful interactions (face to face interactions, including both verbal and nonverbal communications), which allow one person to give to and receive from the other.
Although online daters may be able to exchange messages after they pass each others initial screening on the bases of evaluating the category base information. The process is opposite of the interaction - based attraction. The meaniful interactions depends on two factors.
- ♡ The right opportunity. The right time, place, person and further communications.
- ♡ The right mind. Absense of bias about self and others.
The right opportunities are significant. Unless people who possess the attributes and tendencies have the opportunities to implement them to the target attraction.
On the other hand, the right mind is more important factor. Why have some individuals who have encountered good opportunities of meeting their ideal mates lost the chances to develop the desired relationship ? The answer is that mostly they have the dysfunctional mind, with emotional baggage of fear, anxiety, or other mental conflicts and past hurts in interpersonal situations.
They fear experiencing invalidation from the target of attraction because they use superficial categories to define the self and others as well as to predict the effectiveness of their possible relationships, ignoring the affection messages from the real people who are attracted to them.
All categories are just the maps of substitutes of social reality, not the reality itself. When people use categories to predict an interaction ( but not pay attention to the others real communications, they will produce two outcomes:
- ♡ Avoiding love from right individuals
- ♡ Approaching the wrong person(s)
The Ugly Truth About Online Dating
Online dating is really popular. Using the internet is really popular.
A survey conducted in 2013 found that 77% of people considered it " very important " to have their smart phones with them at all times.
With the rise and rise of apps. If you want to think about dating as a numbers game ( and apparently many people do ), you could probably swipe left / right between 10 - 100 times in the span of time that it would take you to interact with one potential date in "real life."
With the popularity of sites. More and more of us insist on outsourcing our love - lives to spreedsheets and algorithms.
PEOPLE LIE ON THEIR ONLINE PROFILES
A study of over 1,000 daters in the USA and in the UK conducted by Global Research Agency Opinions Matters found some very interesting statistics. A total of 53% of U.S. participants admitted to having lied in their online dating profile. Women apparently lied more than men, with the most common dishonesties being about looks. Over 20% of women posted photos of their younger selves. But men were only marginally better. Their most common lies revolved around their financial situation, specifically, about having a better job ( financially ) than they actually do. More than 40% of men indicated that they did this, but the tactic was also employed by nearly a third of women.
Dishonesty decline with age. Maybe older people are just interested in projecting their real self, rather than an imagined or ideal version.
LOOKING FOR A RELATIONSHIP? THAT MUST MEAN ALL YOU WANT IS SEX.
One of the big problems with online dating for women is that, although there are genuine relationship - seeking men on the sites, there are also plenty of guys on there simply looking for sex . While most people would agree that on average men are more eager for sex than women, it seems that many men make the assumption that if a woman has an online dating presence, she's interested in sleeping with relative strangers.
Online dating does represent the convenience of being able to meet others that you probably never would have otherwise, but women should be aware that they probably will receive rude / disgusting messages from horny guys, sexual propositions / requests, dick - pics, and a lot of creepy vibes. NEVER give out your home phone, address, or your personal email, unless you absolutely trust the recipient.